Monday, August 25, 2008



Pain I Bear

Sentencing Statement

Your Honor, my name is Patti Ticknor. I am Lori DeKleines only sibling. I don’t even know where to begin. This experience has been horrendous and traumatizing for me beyond words.

I cared about Ken DeKleine as a brother-in-law for many years, until he premeditated and brutally killed my sister.

I admired him as Lori’s husband once, until I learned he was controlling, manipulative, verbally and physically abusive to my sister; giving the appearance that she was the one with issues. His orchestration of her behavior and my misunderstanding of it deprived me of a relationship with my sister for 20 years and now the rest of my life.

I admired him as a dad too, until he thought it would honestly be best to play God and kill their mother and leave her for them to find. His actions have deprived his children of both parents.

I admired his patriotism and service to his community once, until I learned it was only for show.

Judge, I could go on and on… know all the gory sickening details of what he did and the widespread effect it had on so many people.

Everything Ken has ever said or done has been a lie. He killed my sister, my parents baby girl and my niece and nephews mother. The pain and despair I feel are beyond words. I don’t understand how someone I once cared about was actually that evil and planned and brutally killed my sister. Because he thought his kids would be better off?? She LOVED them with all her heart. He quotes “being at peace and able to sleep now”. How does that make sense?? I struggle every single day to get my arms around the irrationalness of all this senselessness. I will never be the same. My spirit, heart and life are permanently dented and scarred. He has tarnished my sense of humanity and shaken my security. I am still suffering from depression, anxiety and disillusionment.

My heart aches and every fiber of my being hurts. I have missed countless days of work as a result. I feel so much anger towards Ken. It is hard to imagine ever being genuinely happy again. With Gods help and the support of my family and friends, I know one day I will be again. My faith is strong and God promises in his Word in Jeremiah 29 “For I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not harm you. Plans to give you a hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart” This has been both my sister and my favorite passage for many years. I did not even know that until the funeral…..

Aside from all the things I have mentioned….the thing that hurts the most is that I, in spite of the usual sibling rivalries, in the last 20 years did not get to experience a relationship with my sister where Ken wasn’t pulling all the strings and making circumstances appear to be opposite of what they were. We had reconciled literally a year ago. We were connecting and becoming friends. Years of misunderstandings were being sorted through and I actually, after so many years of disliking her, told her I loved her on Christmas day. The last time I saw her alive.

Ken has robbed me of the joy and pleasure I was experiencing in connecting with my sister. In my life on this earth, I will never experience that. He killed her. I am an only child. I will never see her at family functions again. Never read her silly emails. Never hear her weird sense of humor. Never get another goofy card from her. Never see her in her assortment of Disney clothes or “teacher sweaters”. Never see another scrapbook; that I used to mock but actually admired, again.

I am still grieving deeply, but I have hope. In Thessalonians, God promises that “We believe that Jesus died and rose again and so we believe that God will bring with Jesus those who have fallen asleep in him…upon my death or his return we will be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air. And so we will be with the Lord forever.” At that time I will see Lori, my sister, in heaven and we will have a perfect relationship forever. My hope lies in my loving, caring, faithful, holy and just God.

Ken’s earthly fate now lies in your hands Judge. His eternal judgment is in Gods. I want Ken DeKleine to never see the light of day again and to be placed in the worst possible prison possible far away from the state of Michigan. Since he has shown no value for human life or emotions as well as no remorse and has abused his authority as a police officer that he be placed in general prison population.

Thank you for the opportunity to share my sadness and pain as well as my hope.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

hey patty,
thinking about you. its january 8, 2010 and my heart is hurting for you all.
Scott Los